Fear - The Broad Place

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Fear

Hi everyone,

This is Emily, I am a meditation teacher here at The Broad Place. I have been working with Jac and Arran for years now, assisting on Retreats, knowledge courses and working full time on projects and the nuts and bolts of The Broad Place as well as studying and graduating to become a qualified Vedic meditation teacher. Jac and I spent over 12 months developing the Integrated Meditation program, and I am thrilled to now be contributing with teaching meditation courses in Sydney. I am going to contribute some writing once a fortnight, and would love your feedback on what it is that you are interested in reading.

First up though, I love this quote, in one sentence I feel equal parts motivated, like the whole universe is behind me and terrified, as I know the trap of fear. I’ve spent a lot of time searching outside of myself for answers to some of the big questions of life; Where should I be, what should I do, Why am I here? I’ve pushed, pulled, screamed and cried to try make this method work.

As shocking as it was to the mind I eventually came to terms that this search outside was futile. How can I possibly allow space for meaningful, intuitive answers to shine through when my waking hours are overflowing with the busyness of trying to think my way out of/into a situation, place or idea.

Yet the biggest learning curve and what really threw me was how easy it is to fall back into this trap (again and again) even with all the philosophical books, inspirations podcasts and personal practices that are meant to make me a fail-safe human being..right!!?

I’m not usually one for new years resolutions but this time ‘round I committed myself to leaning into fear. To continue moving forward regardless of the chatter that pops up telling me to stay small. Only a few weeks into the year and somehow this had already gone out the window, I found myself telling anyone I could about the tragedy that is my life (rolls eyes). Naturally every move I made was full of friction, not to mention all the loved ones I was leaving in my wake.

Eventually, I had to look within without judgement of myself, without any embarrassment and recommit to my resolution. Taking walks on the beach, burying my feet in the sad and turning my face to the sun, not rushing to “fix” anything but taking my time to read short and sweet words from those who inspire me and most importantly meditating, longer and more diligently then I ever have.

This process is one to be truly grateful for, within hours I could feel a huge shift. Like the lights were back on and everything became smoother, even the rough bits. I thank my meditation practice for this, as it expands on the space within, providing clarity and certainty.

I hope by sharing this I can help at least one person to look at themselves with love, knowing there is never a good time, right time or easy time to recommit to yourself, but there is also nothing more rewarding, uplifting and grounding than investing in you!

Emily x

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