A School for Creativity, Consciousness & Clarity

Down That Chute

I love Tina Fey, and I love this quote. Overthinking jams up the whole system. We just have to get in and get our hands dirty. When we were in London in January, I met the most wonderful Aikido Sensei, and just being in her dojo, I got emotional, as I hadn’t been to karate in such a long time. And I expressed how much I missed it and my Sensei. She asked very simply, ‘what’s stopping you from going?’. I replied, ‘just a hundred excuses in my head’. She gently laughed.

Because we all do this, avoid the things we adore. I am back now steadily many times a week in the dojo. It’s a 30-­40 minute drive each way. Each class is 90 minutes in length to over 2 hours.

It’s at times unbearably hot, I could cry at how terrible I am at karate, how ashamed I am at how uncoordinated I am, and how much I wish I could go daily like many of the others. I physically ache after some classes and walking up stairs hurts and I am exhausted. I experience frustration and fear unlike in any other area of my life. My ego is not just crushed but obliterated, every session.

I am also mind-blowingly present when there, all thoughts dissolve. I am completely in my physical body, intuitive, graceful and in awe of the capabilities, our bodies grant us. I am brought to tears at how lucky I am to be able to move like this when people in my life that I love cannot due to disabilities. I am inspired beyond belief by my Sensei and his wiseness, his consciousness, his endless patience, and generosity.

The joy it brings me I can’t even describe. And the wonder at how when I actually make it a priority everything else just falls in and around it.

What are you avoiding that you love? Really look at what you fear if you do it, and how beautiful life is when you do engage. Get on down that bloody chute.

Sent with love,

Jac x

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