There are so many ways in which self-sabotage presents, and I could literally spend a year’s worth of Letters writing about it, but I find the most common one is BEING UNABLE TO SAY NO. Too often we chicken out in a moment when we already have that sinking feeling, and say yes to something we don’t want to. It’s a clear no, but we don’t want to disappoint someone else, so we say yes.
Ironic isn’t it, because that’s usually exactly what we end up doing; by cancelling, by being negative in our energy about it, by begrudgingly going ahead with it, etc. We end up doing the very thing we tried to avoid by saying yes in the first place.
So what if we go clear about our intention to serve others, which is going to take sweet truth-telling; to ourselves and to another. What if we led from a place of integrity, and could pause, check-in, and be clear about what was going on. What if we learnt to stop justifying our no with tiny white lies, or stretches of the truth, or too much explanation, and simply said a kind no.
When we continually set ourselves up to fail, with a strained yes, or a too slow no, and all the overthinking and protecting that goes with it, it’s time we stepped up and moved from a place of integrity and honesty.
Written with love,